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MAYBE IT'S TIME
TO LET YOUR WALLS DOWN
& LET LOVE SHINE
just for you

LOVE it, HATE it, It's all yours.

mistakes you knew,
i've made a few

~it's the heart afraid of breaking that never learns to dance; it's the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance; it'sthe mind afraid of losing never learns to give; it's the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live.

~i just can't see things working out the way i planned them in my head. so forget it, i'm running.

~sometimes you have to break the rules and stand apart ignore your head and follow your heart.

~acknowledge me or lose me forever.

~what we do doesn't define who we are, what defines us is how we rise after falling down.

~don't tell me the sky's the limit when there are footprints on the moon.

~you're so unpredictable and i'm so typical. i tried to sell you a heart before you saw the world.

~sometimes i can't believe my eyes. i want to stare up and get lost in the city lights because i've had enough and this is the end and now i understand that a heart breaks, it does not bend

~how are we expected to live in a real world when more than hald of the people living in it are fake?

~ dreams are the only place to where everything seems to be perfect, nothing is out of reach and everything you want, you have

~things happened for a reason, tears eventually fade and one day everything will be exactly how its supposed to be; moving on is a process, you have to promise yourself you're really ready to let go.

~ im thinking its a sign that the freckles in our eyes are mirror images and when we kiss they perfectly alligned.

~guard your honor, let your reputation fall where it will and outlive the bastards.

~there are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

~liars can't tell lies apart because they believe that everyone is always lying, just like them. they never trust in others.

~when you are in love, you can't fell asleep because reality is better than your dreams.

~some people come into our lives and dissappear; while others stay for a while, make footprints and we'll never be the same again.

~it's not love that hurts.it's the infatuation with what we so blindly accept as love that hurts.true love should never have to hurt.

~sometimes it's easier to day i don't care than to explain all the reasons you do.

~maybe sometimes it's a good thing to stumble. because there's a better way to stand. maybe sometimes we cry. because laughter cannot hide the worst.

~fake a smile like nothing is wrong. talk like everything is perfect. act like it's all a dream. pretend none of this is hurting. just so maybe i'll actually start to believe the lies in between.

~you'll never know untill you try. you'll never try until it's too late.

~someone will always catch you when you fall. and it won't always be who you thought it would. the people you think love you most might watch you fall, wait, and then congratulate you when you find your own way back up. this doesn't mean they love you less. they just know that you're stronger than you give yourself credit for.

~i'd give it all, everything and anything, but i wouldn't give up just like that.

~the best you can do is do the right thing. the second best you can do is the wrong thing. and the worst you can do is nothing.

~fight for the things you love, love the things you're fighting for.

~i'm not the person i use to be, i admit, a lot of shit got to me.

~in my heart if someone tells me i can't do something, i'm gonna do it just to prove i can.

~be the best you can be, and the worst without being get caught.

~when you get to the end of the rope, tie a knot and hang on.

~it's too late to walk away, because i've already stumble. and i'll keep falling, until i hit the ground-again.

~don't give up when you still wanna try. don't wipe your tears when you still wanna cry. don't stop asking questions if you still wanna know.

~the simplest things we tend to ignore are the simplest thing that matters so much more.

~only tears know how to remind us, we all break the same.

~i want to make a decision, but i forgotten how to chose.

~and here i go again. thinking about what i. could have done. would have done. should have done.

~living up to the expectations without cracking the pressure.

~how many times are you going to let someone say they'll never do it again before you realise they will.

~i've built a wall. not to block anyone out. but to see who loves me enough to climb over it.

~too often, the things you want are the thing you don't have. desire leaves us heartbroken and wears us out. but as tough as wanting something can be, the people who suffer the most are the people who don't know what they want.

~it's hard to wait around for something you know might never happen, but it's even harder to give up when you know it's everything you ever wanted.

~under my feeling. under my skin. under the thoughts from within. learning the subtext of the mind.

~find grace in in mistakes

~with love and grief in mind, not yet ready to give all in and crumble.

~when something unexpected comes, just pick it up and run.

~you closed you eyes. that's the difference. you cannot believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel. it you're ever going to have other people to trust you, you must feel that you can trust them too. even when in the dark. even when you're falling.

~did i make it that easy to walk right in and out of my life?

~simple dreams are the most painful because they seem so reasonable, so personal, so attainable. always close enough to touch but never close enough to hold.

~when you can lean on no one else, you'll find yourself.

~if you want what you've never had, you have to do what you've never done before.

~it's one thing to understand, but another to accept.

~staring up at the stars at night. i'm satisfied to know although we're million miles away, we sleep under the same sky.

~two stars blinking in the vast blue sky, shining and making signals, seem so close yet so far.

~sometimes you just have to run, and never turn back until you've reach where you want to be.

~just because you deserve it, doesn't mean they're gonna give it to you, you have to fight for it.

~if you don't understand silence, you don't deserve words.

~don't be so quick to judge, i only chose what to show.

~one of the hardest moments in life is deciding whether to give up or to try harder.

~when you have everything you ever wanted, that's when you have somthing to lose.

~you really shouldn't say i love you unless you mean it. but if you mean it, you should say it a lot. people forget.

~what done is done, i can't change time. but i'll be damned if i'm not gonna try.

~the trouble is, if you don'to risk, you risk even more.

~you have to learn to push through your fatigue even when you're tired.

~there's a reason why you're gone this far, just be yourself.

~somethings are meant to be broken, imperfect, chaotic. it's just the way the universe provides contrast.

~screw it. or love it.

~we spend time telling ourselves that everything happens for a reason. when in reality we give reasons for everything that happens.

~something simple as words can have such a strong affect on feelings.

~never say sorry for saying what you feel. that's like apologizing for being real.

~sometimes you don't know you've crossed a line until you're already on the other side.

~eyes are the doorways to heart, where all the love resides.

~if you love someone, you would be willing to give up everything you have. but if they love you back, they'd never ask you to.

~torn between a world of hates and a world of dreams. so much to lose, so much to gain, so much to fight for, so much to change.

~optimism means expecting the best, confidence means handling the worst.

~i took a chance, took a shot. you might think i'm bullet proof, but i'm not.

~if you believe it's in my soul. i'd say all the words that i know. just to see if it would show. that i'm trying to let you know.

~and then i remember to relax and stop holding on to it. everything then flows through me like rain and i can't feel gratitude for every single moment of a stupid life.

~sometimes to move forward, you have to look back.

~the more you care the more you lose.

~broken into pieces but no one can see it. you won't believe, i have nothing left to lose.

~behind my smile is a hurting heart. behind a laughter i'm falling apart. who you see isn't who i really am.

~capture my feelings in a box. make it glass so the world can see. seal it up. do not touch. the vulnerability i behold is beyong my control.

~when life offers a dream so far beyond expectations, it's not resonable to grieve when it comes to an end.

~you bite your tongue and pretend that you're made of stone. you never let it show, but honey, everybody knows.

~give up what you can't keep to gain what you can't lose.

~if you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything.

~dance to no music, love without fear.

~love does things for reasons that reasons cannot understand.

~if it is true love, fight as hell for it because it's worth it.

~seduction is destruction, love is a function, sex is a succession. put your powers to seduce the showstoppers and make them the jawdroppers, gear into love without being a disfunctional relationship, and get down dirty if you reach the right level of feeling cause sex is no reduction even in this recession.

~there is always some madness in love, but there is also always some reason in madness.

~don't worry about not falling in love, in fairytales, they fall in love in the last page.

~almost lovers always brings heartahce.

~if you don't go after what you want you'll never have it. But sometimes, what you want is not what you need, and what you need may not be what you want.


knock yourself out.

February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
February 2010
March 2010
April 2010
May 2010
June 2010
September 2010
October 2010
December 2010
January 2011
February 2011

thank you.


is it possible?

Is it possible?
That i'm falling in love?
Or that i'm already in love?


Everytime you stood by me, i feel so comfortable. Even though we did not have the chats. I still think i do have something for you. I'm not sure what it is, but you've been on my mind for the whole day. I couldn't beleive this. It's been so long since this have happenned. Even though i hid it well, I don't know how to say, or what to say.


I've lost so many times. But this time, I'm going to keep you. I want to keep you, i really hope you do. I like you. I really really do. And i hope you do, somehow... Please, chose to like me. Please, let me be the one.


Am i awakening love right now? Because i cannot think. I gotta run away from this world. I need you by my side, i need answers. I can't bare it anymore. I'm too good at acting, infact, i think that everything is fake. Fake, i tell you. It cannot be true anymore. Please, i don't know what to do. I like you, and i hope you like me back. Tha's all i ask.


Shit. You've been running through my mind for the whole day.

Stop it will you? OR just gimme an answer. Please?



~love me~






Rushing and racing, running in circles.
Moving so fast i'm forgetting my purpose.
Blur of the traffic is sending my spinning, getting nowhere.
My head and my heart are colliding chaotic.
Pace of the world, I just wish i could stop it.
Try to appear like i've got it together, i'm falling apart.
Save me, sombody take my hand and lead me
Slow me down, don't let love pass me by
Just show me how, cause i'm ready to fall
Slow me down, don't let me live a lie
Before my life flies by
I need you to slow me down
Sometimes i fear that i might disappear
In the blur of fast forward i falter again
Forgetting to breathe, i need to sleep, i'm getting nowhere
All that i've missed i see in the reflection
Pass me while i wasn't paying any attention
Tired of rushing, racing and running, i'm falling apart
Slow me down by Emmy Rossum


8:17 PM Thursday, February 26, 2009


just some words i need to say

Sometimes, i wish i can just pour everything out in your face.

A.
Everytime i look into your eyes, you look better and better. I
seem to grown more attracted to you over the times. You never fail to make me
laugh or smile even in the deepest time, i just cannot get mad over you. You
remember detail things about me. I cannot get over you. I really like you. I
just hope, you would like me back. Please? somehow? I hope we will grow in our
relationship. You're a really good person. I love you. You said you have faith
in me. You're the only one that ever said that right in my face. Thanks for all
the faith and confidence, i really appreciate it. Most of all, thanks for making
me smile.
J.
I love you ever since we met. It was like love at first sight.
But i do not dare admit it to myself because i thought it would never work. We
talked, but we just cannot face each other and admit we're head over heels about
each other. We're both scared of rejection. Finally, i told you how i feel. And
you rejected me, i was completely broken. But i still try to keep my dignity
high. It's tough, i tried. Then, the next day, you ask for me. I thought you
just want to make it up for me. But no, you really did mean it. I rejected you
without listening to your explanation. Little did you know, that i'm really soft
headed. I said no because i don't know how it would work. I'm sorry. I'm really
sorry. You broke up with your girlfriend just to be with me, yet i told you off.
I'm really really sorry. This is a decisoin that i regreted, and i don't know
how to path it up. Please, i hope you would give me another chance. Just
friernds will do. Just friends is all i ask. Thank you. I love you, always will.
You're epic, you're unforgettable.
~love~


11:38 PM Monday, February 23, 2009


that's it


Time flies. Can you believe it? That's it. Season's over. The end. Curtains are finally closing, a standing ovation was given. Lights and camera flashes before us, snapping away, like we're real celebrities. It was quite a chaos.

It's been a great and amazing season. I've learned to never give up, and there's always time to catch up if you have the heart. Like really, heart is all it was. As long as you commit youself to it, you'll succeed. There's another thing. Confidence. I've learned to have confidence, but not over the top. I've learned to be aware and be confidence that i can do it. I've learned to admit the truth and live with it. I've learned to give, and take. I've learned to forgive, i've learned to live with the fact that my students are far better than me. I've learned to help others, i've learned to be thankful, i've learned to make a fool of myself. I've learned when to shuddap. I've learn quite a lot over this past while.

But the difference is, you guys have a gift. Whereas, we have to work our ass off, in order to be your level. That's the difference, but that ain't stopping me form achieving what i want, dreaming and getting what i want. Just to let you know, i'm satisfied with the season.

And i can't wait for another, the colors are fading.


~with love~


6:19 PM Friday, February 20, 2009


giving my all

I'M GIVING MY ALL.
GIVE IT ALL UP.
GIVE IT ALL BACK.
NO REGRETZ. NO REGRETZ. NO REGRETZ.
GIVE EVERYTHING.
UNTIL THERE'S NOTHING LEFT.
NOTHING LEFT.
GIVE. GIVE. GIVE
I'M DESPERATELY IN NEED FOR A MIRACLE.
GOD BLESS ME.
I KNOW HE WILL.
BECAUSE HE LOVES ME.

~give up~

Miracles Do HAPPEN!
I really gave it all. I feel ultrablessed. I really have no clue whatsoever that's happenning. Somtimes, i feel like i get more t han what i deserve. And i feel really lucky even though i complain or whine a lot. I really feel blessed and thanks for everythign that's happenning to me. Because i know there's a reason behind everything.
Lemme tell you. My god is an everylasting God. He's the only God. He's amazing and wonderful, he knows you better than anyone else. Most of all, he knows how to love. Love is a strong word, and he understands the depth and the meaning of love, because he is LOVE. I LOVE GOD. And GOD LOVES YOU. GOD LOVES ME TOO. There ain't such thing as limited love, you can only keep on loving people, keep on creating space for people. There's no limit to love, create as much as you can, spread it around the people, there's always room for love, always.


10:10 AM Tuesday, February 10, 2009


foolishness.


I like you. I really do.

Everytime you tickle me, poke me, hug me. I don't know how to react, part of me wants to back off, because you're so touchy. Part of me wants to hold you tight and never let you go. Anyhow, everytime you try to get closer to me. I reject you or turn my back on you. I'm so sorry. This is truly my fault. I really don't mean to reject you. But my actions always contradict what i say.

I hope, that you won't give up on me. I'm sorry, i'll try to open up more.

I really need to break past the wall in front of me. I really want to know you more. I hope you know that i'm struggling. I hope you know that i care, i really do. But it seems impossible. Because i can never prove it. I'm sorry. Please, don't give up on me. Help me, Save me from myself. Thanks, for all the thoughts.


Please, don't give up on me, i beg you.

~this is all i'm asking for~


9:06 PM Friday, February 06, 2009